Isom Kuade 
I’m not here to promote adult content, or defend what I do personally. The fact of the matter is online porn exists and is a part of millions of marriages and households whether you agree with it or not. Maybe understanding why it’s in your household may help you better deal with it in whatever way you see fit in under your roof. Ignoring it won’t make it go away.
In my house?
It’s an accepted byproduct of modern marriage.
All I can do is share my reasons I use the “private browsing” option.
I’m a man
At the end of the day, before I was ever a father or husband, I was a red-blooded American male. We can debate all day whether or not our natural male inclinations should be a part of our makeup or be reflected in our actions, but it’s not going to change the fact that men and women are just different. The struggle a woman faces regarding body image or chocolate cravings will never be 100% clear to a man. We don’t walk in your shoes. We don’t know what’s it’s like to be a woman in today’s world. We never will. We can empathize, but we can’t fully understand.
Same goes for men. We’re wired differently. We’re visually stimulated sexually and fight our natural inclination to disrespectfully ogle at women every single day. The gentleman in us has to repress the neanderthal in us. The W.E.B. Dubois has to silence our inner 2 Chainz. We all have it. Porn is that inhibited release for many of us – myself included. I’m just a filthy man, and I can accept that.
Fantasy Without Judgement
Let’s face it, most married men are hardly living out their sexual fantasies in the bedroom with their wives. We want to, but it takes much more than a creative idea to turn it up in the bedroom. Finding time, childcare, the energy, the right connection point, and so much more can get in the way of bringing fantasies to life. And on top of that, there are many fantasies that don’t fit the traditional mold of an American marriage model. So what are you to do then? Porn – that’s what.
There’s definitely a less judgemental space online when you can find entire categories dedicated to the things your wife gave you a side eye over. It’s not that she’ll never do it, it’s just that your virtual fantasy is simply a click away right now, and can also serve to prove to your significant other your concept isn’t so left field after all. Almost every spouse knows that revealing your deepest desires could potentially result in your spouse questioning the very core of the person they decided to eternally hitch their lives to. Sometimes porn is just more simple.
But it should never be the solution to intimately sharing yourself.
Spicen Up the Bedroom
Adult content can give you ideas. Racks on racks of ideas. I mean, have you ever really tried to count the categories? People are into everything – and I mean everything. And while I can pass on at least 70% of the stuff that’s out there, it doesn’t mean that the other 30% couldn’t school me to something. It’s also a place where my wife can sheepishly point out what’s hot to her. In short, it lets us communicate better. And when there’s better communication, there’s better bedroom life – or living room – or kitchen – or whatever’s spicy to you that day.
Frustration
Married men are sexually frustrated – point blank. One of the reasons is because we’re ironically over sexualized. I never said these were good reasons to watch adult content online, I just said they were true reasons. I also know plenty of married men who feel porn helps keep their sorry frustrated behinds at the house rather than reverting back to their “hunter” ways. Truth be told, as soon as the orgasm hits, his one track mind is clear again and he’s still in the safe comforts of his own home ready to tackle that honey-do list.
Maintenance
Females produce one egg per month, and their bodies automatically take care of the overproduction. It’s the beauty of nature, and just another sign of how superior female engineering is. The male body produces over 12 billion sperm per month and the only release process is a manual one unfortunately. While most men would prefer their wives to help with this task, wives already have enough on their plate to worry about his 12 billion monthly issues. So with or without the help of online porn or spousal support, the deed will get done regardless. The adult themed URL’s simply help make it a more efficient and streamlined process. It’s a burden.
So how do you handle adult content in the house? Do you ban it? Watch it with your spouse or alone? Is it something you would like share more of with your significant other?
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